I Would Say So

Lovers-couples-at-park-river-stream-fog

I feel a desire for you

and I would say so

I live without love, alone

and I would say so

I would say so

and tell you the truth.

VZ, Dili, March 7th, 2017

Emptyness

Why does this heart feel so empty? 
Despite all the beautiful things it has for companions?
Among all the conversation, laughter and friendship
Still, there is only emptiness remains.
 
Within the loudness,
I feel everything becomes mute.
Within the muteness,
I hear the loudness yells.
A smile crafted in my face,
Yet the tears and grief fully seal my heart.
 
Oh, the Conqueror of my heart…
What have you done to me? 
Till it becomes hard for me to turn back?
 
At wherever I am,
To wherever I go,
Only your shadow remains there
With  an open arms waiting for me
To enfold me with the hugs.
 
Oh, the dear of my heart …
When could the miracle open its eyes to us?
Because my heart is becoming withered
By holding on this expectation.

VZ,  Dili, December 18th, 2014

Continue reading “Emptyness”

Who is A Woman for You?

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Image: Google source https://wall.alphacoders.com/big.php?i=322289

(Tetum-English translated version poem ‘Se Mak Feto Ba O?’. Dedication to the International Women’s Day on March 8)

I.

When she walks along the street

You gaze at her with lust, and then you whistle and call her ‘beautiful’!

When she does not turn around, you call her ‘arrogant’  

If she does turn around, then in hasty, you turn out mute completely

Like the hand that hides away, right after throwing a stone

If you do want to praise her, dignify her with respect instead.

II.

You call her ‘darling’ then take her to the beach

You promise her the dream of tomorrow in exchange for her trust

In the sweet words, you ask her to give her whole self to you

Somehow, this is not what she actually seeks.

She does need your hands, to push her facing the mystery of tomorrow

Show her instead, how can she not surrender to chase the dream?

III.

You call her ‘daughter’ from your own flesh and blood

Yet your love is greater for the son only

You teach her, that her destiny is to serve

You value her youth with earthly wealth

At the end, she bears the entire burden alone

Because of the one who do not value her with a vow of true love

IV.

You call her ‘wife’, the one who should fear and serve you until her last breath

You are therefore her possessor, as the dowry has been handed over

Indeed, your dowry is no more precious than her soul, a most beautiful soul of all

To you, she is a whole life companion, a companion for your body, heart, and soul

With her faith, hope, and perseverance

Despite most of the times, you throw and slap her with your own fear and anger

With sharp hands and words, you hurt her body and soul

Then you let her heal her pain alone

Why do you not guard her, as does the tree sheltering the flower?

V.

Who is a woman for you?

Have you tried to understand her in your mind and your soul?

What else things you found? Do ask!

VZ, Dili, March  4th,  2016

Siapakah Wanita Bagimu?

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https://www.theodysseyonline.com/ways-hurt-ourselves

(Puisi terjemahan Tetum-English ‘Se Mak feto ba O?’ Dedikasi untuk Hari Wanita Internasional  March 8)

I

Ketika dia berjalan menyusuri jalanan

Matamu memandangnya bernafsu, kau bersiul dan panggil dia ‘Cantik!’

Ketika dia tak menoleh, kau bilang dia ‘sombong’

Jika dia menoleh, kaupun membisu seketika.

Bagai tangan yang sembunyi habis melempar batu

Bila kau ingin memujanya, muliakanlah dia dengan  hormat.

II

Kau panggil dia ‘kekasih’, kau bawa dia ke pantai

Kau janjikan mimpi hari esok tuk menangkan percayanya.

Dalam manisnya kata, kau minta dia serahkan diri, seluruhnya untukmu.

Tapi bukanlah ini yang dia cari.

Dia butuh tangamu, untuk mendorongnya hadapi misteri hari esok

Tunjukkan padanya, bagaimana agar tak menyerah mengejar mimpi?

III

Kau panggil dia ‘putri’ dari darah dagingmu sendiri

Namun cintamu lebih besar untuk sang putra saja.

Kau ajari dia, bahwa takdirnya adalah melayani

Kau hargakan kemudaannya dengan harta benda duniawi.

Pada akhirnya, dia sendiri yang menanggung semua beban

Oleh sebab seorang yang tak hargai dia dengan janji cinta sejati.

IV

Kau panggil dia ’istri’, patutlah ia takut dan layani kau sampai mati.

Kaulah pemiliknya, sebab mahar telah diserahkan

Padahal maharmu tak lebih berharga dari jiwanya, jiwa yang lebih indah dari segalanya.

Dia temani kau sepanjang hidup, dengan tubuh, hati dan jiwanya

Dengan keyakinan, harapan dan keteguhannya.

Walau sering kau lempar dan tampar dia, dengan takutmu dan amarahmu sendiri

Dengan tangan dan kata-kata tajam kau lukai tubuh dan jiwanya

Lalu kau biarkan dia sembuhkan diri sendirian

Mengapa tidak kau jaga dia seperti pohon menaungi bunga?

V

Siapakah wanita bagimu?

Sudahkah  kau coba pahami dia dalam pikiran dan perasaanmu?

Apa saja yang kau temukan? Tanyalah!

 

VZ, Dili, 4 Maret 2016

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

DO NOT LET THOU BE MAD AT ME

Old-Man-in-Sorrow-(On-the-Threshold-of-Eternity)

Vincent van Gogh’s Old Man in Sorrow (On the Threshold of Eternity) Painting (http://www.vangoghgallery.com/painting/drawings-and-paintings-compared.html)

Do not let Thou be mad at me
When Thou  are hungry and thirsty
I do not feed Thou the food and drink
For my food and drink
Are not appropriate for Thy mouth

Do not let Thou be mad at me
When Thou are a foreigner
I do not take Thou to stay in my house
For my house is dirty and unkempt
It deserves not to accept Thy feet trail

Do not let Thou be mad at me
When Thou are naked
I do not give Thou clothes to wear
for my clothes is soiled and torn
It is not suitable for Thy holy body

Do not let Thou be mad at me
When Thou are imprisoned
I have not visited Thou

For I myself also live in a prison

Do not, do not let Thou be mad at me
for Thy words already enough to judge me.

VZ, Dili, March 6th, 2017

ABOUT YOU

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Memories Of Love by Emerico Imre Toth (https://www.pinterest.com/explore/art-love-couple/)

To you, the one who have always been beautiful to me

One day I will write about you

I will write

How destiny dragged my feet to you,

How these eyes of mine saw your beauty

How this mind and heart, always tell the story about you

I will paint your good deeds in words

In this blank piece of paper

The colors will display your dreams

Every line will tell each of your struggles

With the remaining ink of your memory

This still saved in my heart

Let me praise you

In this painting of words

Let everybody see your black and white

Because…

Until any time

My heart will continue claiming

That you are still the beautiful one to this heart…

*****

 

 VZ, Dili  March 3rd, 2016

 

 

WHO DO YOU SAY I AM?

Tetum-English Translated poem ‘Ba o, Ha’u Ne’e Se?’

Thou asked me

‘Who do you say I am?’

I fell silent. I looked around.

I heard people called Thou with great names.

Peter also called Thou with a great name. Then Thou smiled.

Yet Thou still looked at me, then asked me, though;

‘Who do you say I am?’

I blankly looked at Thou, and then replied;

‘I do not know yet. Because until now, I continue seeking to know about who Thou are.’

VZ, Villa-Verde, February 23th  017

Jika KasihMu Serupa Ibu Yang Mengasihi Anaknya

Jika Engkau mengasihiku serupa ibu yang mengasihi anaknya

Kumohon padaMu

Janganlah kasihMu berhenti

Sebab aku adalah seorang anak yang akan selalu menyusahkanMu dengan pikiran, perkataan dan perbuatanku

Sebab itu, jika Engkau hentikan kasihMu sebagaimana seorang ibu yang hendak melupakan anaknya

Maka anak itu akan tersesat….

Villa-Verde, Dili, 26 Februari 2017

(VZ)