Childhood Memory

Dear mom

I am now recalling my childhood memory with you

It was not a good one though.

You left me raised by your sisters

As you went away for some days, sometimes even couple of weeks

They said you went away to get me some bread and sweet cakes.

I did not want them. 

I missed you so much 

Yet you did not come back for weeks

I felt so hurt. 

So I cried out loud every night.

Your sisters almost gave up on me.

They told me to stop crying and be quiet. 

That was how I learnt to stop missing you. 

Then one day you came unexpectedly. 

I was playing alone with my clay toys. They told me to get up and run for you and welcome you home.

I did turn around and stared at you blankly. I did not know what to say. I just sat still and being quiet again.

Your face turned regretful. 

Then you came to me and greeted me. ‘Are you alright, darling?’ you said. I just nodded and be quite again.

You felt strange with me. So did I to you.

Since that day, I did not know how to restore this bound between us.

But you keep trying to restore it and you never stop until today.

Dili, 2018

VZ

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For A Bun of Bread

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Do wake up early before the sunrise

Get yourself ready to school

Do study hard everyday and do not you be lazy

Because only with all of this

One day you will earn a bun of bread in your hand

And so my mum advised me.

Later as I grow up, I got a decent job after spending many years at school and college.

Mum said ‘see, you did earn your one bun of bread now’.

I smiled briefly but then inside me, I realized that I am longing for another bun of bread. Perhaps the one that I have not found yet.

VZ

Dili, 16/1/2018

Little Star

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Here comes the night while both my eyes do not yet fall asleep.

In the muteness of the night, I hereby sit and think about how yesterday we met in a temporary eclipse after we have parted for few weeks due to the different rotation we are running.

Last night, together we accompany each other with the stories of yours and mine.

We had the storybook of McQueen and his friend Mater, which is also your favorite movie, got along with us in our reading together session. However, I was the one who read, whereas you only listened and asked questions.

I hope that you were able to pick some lessons from the storybooks I have read to you.

Then, you lingered yourself into my cuddle during some minutes. Before, I used to love counting the duration of this magical moment from one to five. However, you always forbade me to not counting up until you wanted to release me by yourself.

In fact, if only you know, I never want to release you from this beautiful cuddling. The cuddling from two small arms that are so tight yet always strengthens my heart.

The cuddling that empowers me, when I almost give up.

The cuddling that encourages me when I was afraid.

The cuddling that really warms me up when I feel cold.

O Little Star, this cuddling will remain felt here although my rotation has shifted from you.

I beseech you; let your light continue to shine thus it will shine me within these half distances between us.

Good night, Little Star…

VZ, Dili, March 13th, 2016