With my childness
I lift my eyes
Is sitting quietly
With a blade in my hand
I will scratch the present
Perhaps, this way
will reveal itself.
Ho ha’u-nia kiik
Ha’u foti matan
hateke ba oin
Ho lamina iha liman
Ha’u sei koir loron ohin
Karik ho nune’e
Mak loron aban
sei hatudu oin.
To my fellow women
Rising up again
We exist for a great meaning!
Do not be afraid!
Keep moving ahead!
Dili, 8 March 2018
Happy International Women’s Day.
Yesterday… I saw you
On an afternoon before the night came
among the crowd
at the edge of the road
You were sitting alone
I saw a rush in your face
Your eyes looking at something
Perhaps you were waiting for something
Yesterday… I passed in front of you
Surprised and excited to see you again
Then the mouth of mine
called your name right away
and waited for your eyes to find me…
However… nor did your eyes find me at all
Your ears heard none of my call either
You kept standing there
Turning your back
Looking at something else
Thus, I had to get away too
and trying to move on from the moment
Yesterday was just a yesterday
It could not reverse to the present day
Yesterday was just a yesterday
But now I do believe
That tomorrow will be better…
I was blind when I met you
I could not see how bad or good looking you were
All I could do was feeling you in my touch
Listening to your voices, your laugh, your sigh
In my blindness, I had painted you beautifully in my mind
I loved to be with you every day, every hour, every minute
Coz every moment with you was magical
I forgot the whole world
Everytime you called my name
Then a yard of spring flowers blossomed in my heart
Butterflies flies upon the flowers everytime you kissed me
That feeling called ‘love’ blossomed wildly there
I was extremely happy
My blindness was nothing with you being mine
Then one day my eyes could see
I looked for you, you were nowhere to find
My world turned dark
As I could see it clearly now
There is no you, nor your love
I was blind so did my love to you.
Do wake up early before the sunrise
Get yourself ready to school
Do study hard everyday and do not you be lazy
Because only with all of this
One day you will earn a bun of bread in your hand
And so my mum advised me.
Later as I grow up, I got a decent job after spending many years at school and college.
Mum said ‘see, you did earn your one bun of bread now’.
I smiled briefly but then inside me, I realized that I am longing for another bun of bread. Perhaps the one that I have not found yet.
Look up to the sky
That sky of tonight is gloomy
No stars… no moon
Only darkness wraps the heart
That trembles of longing for you so much
Do you also feel it?
The seat beside me is empty
As it waits for your shadow to fill in
Together, we would face the coldness of the night’s wind
We would be talking again
About all those unfinished feelings
We would be witnessing again
How the tremor of this longing had shaken us
We would be unifying the tremble of our hearts
Into a most solid and tightest embrace
We would be sharing the magnificence together for tonight
In a sweetest kiss ever
You and me, together we would be wrapping our souls with this warmth
You and me, together we would be looking up to this night’s gloomy sky
How can all this happen if you do not come along?
The sky of tonight is gloomy
So does my heart.
VZ, Lospalos, January 3rd, 2017.
Honesty is very expensive!
To be honest in a truth is very costly
As you walk according to the counsel of truth
You will get insults, hatred
People say ‘how arrogant you are, how stupid you are, how you do not know anything. Step aside!’
‘Do not you be so self-righteous! Do not you be so sanctimonious!
Let the lies rule over everything to go smoothly!
Who are you to confront?‘
Really my brothers and sisters …
Lying is cheap and easy and keeps everything go smooth
We are sweet to each other
We call each other ‘friends’
But who wants to punish his heart to death?
Is it you or me?
My brothers and sisters…
Honesty for the truth is expensive
But it is the one who gives freedom of life!
VZ, March 24, 2016
When you are here, it is noisy.
When you are not here, it is tranquil and mute.
When you are not here, there is no trouble.
When you are here, there will be trouble.
Yet from the trouble you brought with you, it had made us find the solution together.
You, noisiness, trouble and solution, we never let go of each other.
It is no use for you to continue to tell everyone a fiery story about the ugliness and bad deeds of someone in order to impress your listeners. Probably it does sound amazing telling those stories. However, one day, neither you shall be infallible of mistakes.
O, my friend, the human being is indeed not perfect at all.
VZ, Dili, 2016